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Steaks Are High In Fairfield

2021-04-24 2:00AMish-- Fairfield Police are chasing a cow in backyards off of Black Rock Turnpike Tahmore Drive area. This is no bull but it was last seen on Woodridge Avenue moooving towards High Ridge Road, she's been an udder problem for the cops but I think its cow-ward....I'm sure you've herd these puns before. This news report is made possible by:

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IN-DEPTH FEDERAL INVESTIGATION AFTER DEADLY TESLA CRASH

WASHINGTON, D.C – After a deadly Tesla crash in Texas on Saturday, U.S. Senators Richard Blumenthal (D-CT) and Edward J. Markey (D-MA), members of the Senate Commerce, Science, and Transportation Committee, called on federal investigators to conduct a thorough probe into the crash, and to develop recommendations for how automated driving and driving assistance systems like Tesla’s Autopilot can be improved. According to initial reports, no one was behind the wheel of the Tesla vehicle that crashed in Texas on Saturday, killing two men. Following the crash, Tesla CEO Elon Musk Tweeted that the vehicle’s Autopilot was not enabled, and the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) and the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) have each launched an investigation. “While automated driving and…

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